


Custody

by supercorncob



Series: Karushuu Week 2021 - Collection Thingy [2]
Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Crack, Family, Karushuu Week 2021, M/M, Parents, Siblings, idk - Freeform, judge - Freeform, karushuu, lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-27
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-13 14:14:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,712
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29029998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supercorncob/pseuds/supercorncob
Summary: Asano wants full custody of their children so they go to court.
Relationships: Akabane Karma/Asano Gakushuu
Series: Karushuu Week 2021 - Collection Thingy [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2135511
Comments: 7
Kudos: 46





	Custody

Karma Akabane was tired. So tired that he thought he must be hallucinating, and that the white steps to the courtroom in front of him are a part of his imagination, but how the sign above his head saying ‘Courtroom A’ was something tangible, he knew this wasn’t a game. He leaves a sigh and took another glance at Ana and Berry, the lights of his life, and took a seat on the left side of the court, away from Gakushuu. 

Another part of why he was convinced this was actually happening was because of the sorry looks on the children's faces accompanied by the youngest— third youngest Asano’s scowl. He sighed and tried to keep his gaze on the judge in front, if he looked at Gakushuu he might start to cry. 

—

“Karma,” he had caught the redhead red handed, literally. 

This was the last straw for Gakushuu, when he realized how big of a mistake his involvement with Akabane Karma was. He glared at the older boy for a second more before snatching the 3 month old from his clutches. Poor thing, her hair would be stained red for months now. 

“Hey I read the bottle and it says it’s okay to use on children,” Karma tried defending himself. Gakushuu wasn’t having it though, this was stupid. Karma should’ve known to be careful, Ana wasn’t like other children. The adoption agency had made that very clear. 

“We can’t keep doing this Karma,” Gakushuu shook his head, cradling the 3 month old who was scratching at the blob of red on her forehead. 

“Yeah okay I won’t dye their hair-

“No I mean we can’t continue like this. You have to grow up, I thought that maybe our time together was enough to have you mature, and I thought the children would kept speed the process up,” he pinched at the bridge of his nose, “thinking the children could help was a mistake.”

“What are you saying?”

“I want full custody.”

“That’s ridiculous.”

—

“Order. Take your seats,” the judge’s voice boomed through courtroom A. He was talking to Berry specifically, who wriggled out of Gakushuu’s hold to sit on Karma’s lap. 

That gave Karma hope at least. He smiled and ruffled Berry’s ginger hair. Maybe he could get through this without bursting into tears (!)

“We will be starting this trial for custody now.”

Oh boy. Karma could barely sit through all the oaths (half of them sounded fake) without yawning, and that didn’t leave a good impression on the judge. Then again, the judge already probably hated the redhead. Karma could remember at least five times that he had bumped into the man in front of them on the street and almost ‘accidentally’ spilled strawberry milk on him. 

—

“The first witness will please come to the stand,” the judge called, and with that Koyama walked to the front, straightening up and looking directly at Karma with a smirk. Karma would’ve stuck his tongue out or something if not for Berry looking up at him with pleading eyes. It was clear he wanted to take a nap, and because of that Karma decided he’d let the trial go as smoothly as possible. It was cruel keeping the kid from his nap. 

“I am here to attest to the claims of child abuse and neglect against Akabane Karma,” he started off strong. 

“And can you point to this Akabane Karma?”

“Over there with the red hair, you can’t miss him,” he pointed.

“Thank you, carry on.”

“Well for starters, objectively speaking someone with a record of being tardy and irresponsible when it comes to school shouldn’t be allowed to keep a child for longer than hours at a time,” Karma gritted his teeth, and like he had read the redhead’s mind, Miya Keiji, Karma’s lawyer stood up.

“Objection your honour,” he raised his hand, and the judge nodded to let him speak, “despite rumours of lack of responsibility on my client’s part, he clearly still performs well at school. Consistently coming first or second to only the other man in this custody battle. Should that not also be taken into consideration?” Karma was grateful for that, but he could’ve gone into how he cared about what was important or something, because that argument was oh so easy to refute.

“Your honour, is it not the journey that counts? With both school work and children? Akabane and Asano do tie often in academics, but Asano knows how to manage his time and always shows up for class. In the case of a child, what’s more important? How they grow up, so their childhood, or how they end up? It makes sense to say how they end up, but I guarantee you that without a proper and safe childhood no one ends up well.” Asano nearly face palmed, his speech took far too many turns. He was sure that if it had been him and Karma arguing it would’ve gone by faster.

“Uh, you’re right. Next point?” Karma had the urge to throw a pillow at the judge. Was that guy even paying attention? 

“Yes, on to my next point, once I came over to ask Karma a question about some math, and I saw Berry sitting by the window.”

Silence. How weak could these claims get?

“Your point Natsu- Koyama,” Karma raised an eyebrow. 

“He looked sad, your honour, which is proof that Karma was not treating him right.”

Karma stood up, “he was  _ sick _ !”

It was Gakushuu’s turn to stand, holding Ana in his arms. He glared at Karma and cleared his throat, ignoring the sound of the gavel on wood.

“When  _ Ana _ is sick I don’t let her near the window. I keep an eye on her all the time, making sure to regulate her temperature. I’m a good dad.”

“You forgot their birthday,” Karma interjected, placing Berry on his head, “and they like me better.”

“Your honour, I’m not the only one seeing this right? What do you think would happen to Berry if he fell from 180cms?”

“I wouldn’t let him fall.”

They went on like this, arguing and ignoring the sounds of the other witnesses yelling, the judge’s gavel, and the footsteps approaching the scene.

\--

If Karma was tired, Gakuhou was exhausted. He should’ve listened to his great uncle that one time when he was 16. ‘Never have children,’ well it was too late now. He dragged his feet to the room where all the noise was coming from. 

He had a whole speech planned out for the boys, and another one for Gakushuu to hear in the morning, but the words died on his tongue when he saw the monstrous tent? (He wasn’t sure it was even worthy of that title) Couches and pillows were everywhere, covered by blankets and sheets and at least five futons. If he had been holding a glass he would’ve dropped it right then and there, attracting attention to himself. 

Instead of barging in, he waited in the hall, thinking to himself.  _ Is this what 16 year olds do for fun? What happened to basketball? _ After collecting what was left of his sanity, he walked into the room and cleared his throat. He noticed that within the minute or so he had to himself, the sign that read “Courtroom A” had fallen and was now being trampled along with what he could’ve sworn was Gakushuu’s baby blanket.

Well it was too late to leave now. He had six sets of eyes on him, looking nervously at their sleep deprived ex-principal. 

“Boys?” He started off, but quickly noticed that there was still someone else making noise inside one of the godforsaken tents. 

“How about the time you almost stepped on Ana?” Gakushuu’s unmistakable voice cut through the otherwise silent room. 

“The key word in that sentence is ‘almost’ because I didn’t,” Karma argued back, “they both like me. They take naps around me, which means they must feel comfortable,” he explained. 

“Ha! They only nap around you because you’re boring.”

“Out of the two of us you’re the boring one.”

“Says who?”

“The judge and witnesses who left because of how long your last spiel was,” Karma pointed at the others in the room who had quieted down. He still wasn’t aware that they were being listened to by Gakushuu’s father.

“They had to know the details, if not then I might’ve been dragged into the blame. It was clearly your fault that they almost fell down the stairs, your inability to read instructions has obstructed the peace I’ve worked so hard to build. What do you have to say for yourself?” Gakuhou checked his watch to make sure it was late enough for Gakushuu to be spewing this nonsense. Sure his son had created some nifty things like sculptures and diagrams worthy of national recognition, but peace? The boy knew nothing about that.

2am, acceptable.

“You’re not supposed to take a stroller up the stairs! Even if it was built properly you could’ve died. Ana and Berry could’ve died-”

“You underestimate me Karma. Also the names, the names you picked. They’ll get ridiculed for them,” now that was a low blow.

“I want people to  _ try _ to make fun of them.”

“So what? They’ll be scarred and you get to beat some children up?”

“I would do anything for my kids.”

And that was the last straw. Gakuhou walked into the tent and took the top blanket away before glaring at his son and Akabane. The two of them were speechless.

“Clearly neither of you are ready to be parents,” he sighed, reaching for both Berry and Ana. They would be sleeping in his room for the remainder of his life. 

“Hey-” Ana latched onto Gakushuu’s hair before she could be carried away.

“That’s not- you’re a third party!” Karma protested, holding on to Berry who looked sadder than ever while being pulled away from his dad.

“I’m the grandfather,” Gakuhou rolled his eyes, pulling both Ana and Berry into his arms successfully. He sighed and straightened himself before turning around to go to bed, “I expect this room to be clean in the morning. Oh and Gakushuu?”

“What…” >:( Well this was embarrassing.

“The names Banana and Strawberry are perfectly acceptable for kittens.”

**Author's Note:**

> So I guess custody goes to Gakuhou. eDiting??? who is she?


End file.
